Being a mother is a lot like being a superhero. With the addition of little ones comes new abilities to love, do, and be more. Becoming a mom, in any sense, is to become a part of something much bigger than yourself. A new passion lights anew, totally changing the landscape of your everyday life.
In 2011, iFIT Trainer Tennille Boseman transitioned from an on-the-go lifestyle to one where she made each day count. For Mother’s Day, Tennille was gracious enough to share her story of motherhood, touching on the brilliant life of her son, Jett.
Tell us about your journey to motherhood and your experience as a whole.
Oh wow, this is something that I love to talk about. My experience with motherhood completely changed who I am and has blessed my life in so many ways.
After a perfect pregnancy (aside from morning sickness), I gave birth to my little boy, Jett, on December 2, 2011. From the moment he was born, my husband and I could tell something wasn’t quite right. His limbs would involuntarily spasm, his entire body would become rigid, he wasn’t able to track us with his eyes, and he wasn’t gaining weight. For weeks, we tried to convince the doctors to look further into it. At first, they told us that Jett had a condition called Sandifer Syndrome, which basically means that Jett was suffering from an extreme case of acid reflux. While some of the symptoms matched that diagnosis, we still felt like there was something else that the doctors were missing.
When Jett was six weeks old, he was admitted to the hospital for “failure to thrive.” During that stay, my husband and I demanded that the doctors perform an MRI on Jett. They were hesitant at first but finally performed the procedure. Jett’s MRI results came back with a lot of abnormalities. His cerebellum and brainstem had never fully developed. After more tests and a visit with a heaven-sent neurologist, Jett was diagnosed with a rare brain condition called Pontocerebellar Hypoplasia (PCH).
While we were relieved to finally have a diagnosis, we were heartbroken for our little boy. It was a very difficult time for us, knowing that he wasn’t going to reach the usual milestones that most children reach. Jett was never going to be able to walk or talk. His frail body would require a feeding tube because he wasn’t able to swallow without aspirating. His life would consist of severe respiratory issues, seizures, and sickness. Worst of all, we weren’t sure how long Jett was going to be with us. PCH is extremely life-limiting. Most children with this condition don’t live past the age of two.
Even though Jett suffered daily (which required countless medications), he brought so much joy to everyone who knew him. It’s hard to explain, but this little boy had the strongest spirit. You could literally feel it when you held him. He was such a fighter and a blessing to us all.
Knowing that Jett was here on borrowed time, we prioritized giving Jett the best quality of life possible. We released any expectations of him reaching milestones and, instead, allowed him to write his own story.
We were lucky enough to have Jett for five years. He passed away peacefully on March 2, 2017, surrounded by all the family and friends who loved and cared for him throughout his life. It was a very sacred experience for us all.
How have you worked through and managed your grief?
Within a six-month period, I went through a divorce and witnessed my baby take his last breath. Grief is an ugly beast. It comes and goes in waves. There have been times when I haven’t been able to get out of bed. The pain was excruciating—my body physically ached.
I have done several things to work through my grief. First and foremost, I had to force myself to get my body moving every day. In the beginning, I went hiking quite a bit. There was something special about being out in nature because I felt more connected to Jett. I also attended group therapy (I highly recommend it!) and spent a lot of time journaling my thoughts.
Ultimately, what has helped me cope is having a sense of gratitude. I am extremely grateful that Jett chose me to be his mama. I am grateful for his dad, who I am still very good friends with to this day. I am grateful for the lessons learned and that I can continue to share Jett’s story.
What was the inspiration behind the name “Jett?”
Jett’s father and I were both obsessed with aviation and travel. Call me crazy, but while I was pregnant, I took flying lessons. At nine months pregnant, with Jett tucked away in my belly, I did my first solo flight! It was a pretty amazing experience and one I will never forget. I remember taking the plane off, pulling back on the yoke, and the yoke hitting my (very large!) belly. Once he was born, it was only fitting that we give him the name “Jett.” He became affectionately known as our “Fighter Jett.”
How did you integrate fitness into your schedule while providing care for Jett?
Taking care of a medically fragile child is no easy task. It is an around-the-clock job. There are medications to be administered, feeding tubes to be changed, numerous doctor and specialist appointments, middle-of-the-night visits to the ER, and so much more. I’m joking when I say this, but I basically became a nurse without the official degree.
There were times where I would reach my breaking point. Luckily, we had a village of people who helped us take care of Jett. During these times, I was able to leave the house and go for a run. It was amazing what fresh air and a workout did for my system. I would come back with a renewed sense of hope, a feeling of “I can do this.” Being able to care for me, even for just a few minutes, allowed me to show up better as Jett’s mama.
Jett often became a part of my workouts. We would go on runs together. I would push him in his wheelchair, spin him in circles, and watch his face light up. He would then become my “free weight” as I did squats and full thrusters. I think he loved being that.
In 2015, you published “The Real Deal: A Blended Diet How-To For Your Tubie.” What was it like putting that together?
For 18 months, doctors prescribed a specific type of formula for me to administer through Jett’s feeding tube. While I am not against using formula, I could tell that Jett’s little body was not responding well to it. He was in pain for most of the day as a result.
On a particularly frustrating day, I threw all of his formula in the garbage and began experimenting with blending real food for Jett. I would mix together foods like sweet potatoes, chicken, oatmeal, avocado oil, and almond milk. I had to make the blends thin enough to administer through his feeding tube. It was quite a science experiment, but one that I will forever be happy that I did.
These blends started making a tremendous difference in Jett’s overall health. He started gaining weight and began looking like a healthy little boy. It’s amazing what nutritious food can do for our bodies, right? I began getting questions from other parents of children with feeding tubes. They wanted to know my recipes and methods. Since I was already spending countless hours researching nutrition and feeding tubes, I decided to compile all of the information together. Thus, my book was born!
It was rewarding writing a book of this nature because I know it has helped many frustrated parents out there. For those interested, you can find a free digital copy of my book on Amazon.
What are some of your favorite memories about Jett?
My favorite memories with Jett will always be those small moments that are often overlooked in our normal, busy lives. I absolutely loved cuddling Jett and feeling his breath against my neck. I loved taking hot baths with him and watching him smile as the warm water rushed over his body. I loved taking him out into the sunshine and hearing him giggle as the wind blew through his curly hair. I loved playing his favorite music and dancing with him in our living room.
We also did some pretty crazy things with Jett that I’m sure gave his grandparents a heart attack. Jett had the opportunity to go flying, boating, and paddleboarding often. We could tell that he was an adventurous little boy trapped inside a frail body and wanted to give him as many “typical” experiences as possible.
Do you have a quote that helped you get through the difficult times?
Yes! One of my favorite quotes is, “What is meant for you won’t pass by you.” This particular quote gave me comfort during the most difficult times in my life. I know that Jett was meant to come to me and teach me some very important life lessons. I am so grateful that I was given the opportunity to take care of such a special little boy.
How has your experience affected your outlook on life?
Jett taught me so much. He taught me to appreciate the simple things in life and to live in the moment. I have learned to not sweat the small stuff, slow down, and appreciate the beauty that life has to offer. While I’m still very ambitious and adventurous, I am not as much of a “go, go, go” person anymore. I love taking the time to slow down and watch a beautiful sunset or enjoy a long conversation with a friend or loved one.
What do you hope parents or caregivers can learn from your story?
Sometimes, life isn’t fair, but that doesn’t mean that it can’t be beautiful. Jett’s dad and I could have played the victim card and said, “Why us?” Instead, we chose to believe, “Hell, yes! This is us, and we are going to make the best of it.” Each day is truly a gift. We knew that Jett wasn’t going to be with us for a long time, so we made every single day count.
What advice would you give to someone going through a similar situation?
You’ve got this. You are strong. You are capable. You are not a victim. Take control of whatever situation you’ve been given, but also have a good cry when you need it. Take time for YOU so that you can show up better for those you love. Find the lessons if you can and be grateful for them. Make your life beautiful. Make every moment count.
DISCLAIMER: This blog post is not intended to replace the advice of a medical professional. The above information should not be used to diagnose, treat, or prevent any disease or medical condition. Please consult your doctor before making any changes to your diet, sleep methods, daily activity, or fitness routine, especially if you are pregnant. iFIT assumes no responsibility for any personal injury or damage sustained by any recommendations, opinions, or advice given in this article. Always follow the safety precautions included in the owner’s manual of your fitness equipment.
Opinions of iFIT Trainers are their own and may not be those of iFIT.
